You can always find this page at PaulDuignan.Consulting/sleep.

Many people find it hard to either get off to sleep, or they wake up in the night and then they can not get back to sleep. Use the following steps to get more sleep.

Summary of the getting to sleep tool

1. Get exercise during the day, reduce coffee or tea consumption in the evening, reduce too much stimulation (cell phones etc.) immediately before sleep.

2. Do the breathing exercise below - in through your nose to a count of 4, hold for 4, out through your mouth for 2 counts of 4 and hold for a count of 4.

3. And/or start counting in your head ‘One and one, one and two, one and three . . . ‘ when you get to ‘one and ten’ start with ‘two and one, two and two, two and three . . . ‘ continue this pattern for as long as you like and return to it at the place you left off.

4. Use Progressive Muscle Relaxation to relax your body and encourage sleep.

5. If you are thinking about someone that you have a grievance against, or a problem with, repeat the saying in item 5 below to reduce you spending a lot time thinking about, and being irritated by them.

6. Get up and do some physical exercise or something else around the house rather than just lying in bed continuing to try to get off to sleep.

Details of the Getting to sleep tool

1. Getting physical exercise during the day is helpful in order to encourage yourself to sleep at night. Cutting back on coffee and tea in the late evening can also help. Reducing stimulation immediately before going to sleep is useful. Reading a book, having a shower or a bath is preferable to using your phone or computer immediately before you want to get off to sleep.

2. If you can not get to sleep, or if you wake up in the night, first go through the following breathing exercise at least five times:
   1) take a deep breath to a count of 4 in through your nose (deep into your abdomen by pushing your belly out when you breath in and pulling your belly in when you breath out);
   2) then hold your breath for a count of 4;
   3) breathe out more slowly through your mouth for 2 counts of 4; and,
   4) hold your out-breath for a count of 4 and repeat.

3. If this does not settle you, start counting in your head. ‘One and one, one and two, one and three . . . ‘ when you get to ‘one and ten’ start with ‘two and one, two and two, two and three . . . ‘ continue this pattern for as long as you like. If you stop doing it and return to it later, start where you left off previously.

4. If this does not settle you, do Progressive Muscle Relaxation to relax your body. Once you have done it a number of times using the Youtube below, you can just do some of it by yourself without having to listen to the Youtube. Just go through each muscle group in your body tightening and then letting it go.

   The Youtube is at http://parkerduignan.consulting/relaxation.

5. If part of your stress is that you hold some negativity towards one or more other people. Repeat the following saying to yourself a number of times:
   ’Let them be safe and at well
   Let them be at ease and peaceful
   Let them be looking for the positive and happy
   Let them be caring for themselves and others’.

   There is more information on this tool in the Caring for the Self and Others Tool.

6. If this does not settle you, get up and do some exercise, this can just be walking around the house. If safe, you can go for a walk, even if it is late at night. If you getting of to sleep, or getting back to sleep, is a reoccurring problem over a significant period of time, buy a simple second-hand exercycle if you can afford it and spend some time on this when you wake up at night. Even if you cannot get any exercise, do something else around the house for a while, it is better to do this than to just lie in bed fretting about not being able to sleep.

Please note that when you are dealing with issues around child rearing, relationships, dealing with stress of any type or doing psychological or self-development work, if you find yourself feeling overwhelming emotions, troubling thoughts or actions, you need to talk to a health professional. If you are from New Zealand and need help quickly use a help number.